We tend to always take the little things in life for
granted. I never knew my life would be so complicated without TEARS and SALIVA.
Lately eating has become a nightmare to me, I try to stay
away from food which needs a lot of chewing. But it’s not always as easy and
simple. I am refraining from foods that I love EG: fish, chicken, steak etc. Even eating certain fruit and bread is
also a problem. One of the diseases I have called Sjogrens, causes my white
blood cells to dry out the glands that
produces moisture in my body. And to chew and digest any food you need your
saliva. It also helps protecting the teeth and gums from bacterial infection, and
it spreads the taste of whatever you eating around your mouth.So is basically it enhance the ability of the
taste buds to detect the taste of food.Saliva also makes it easier to talk,a
fact ask anyone who experience stage fright and the associated dry mouth while
giving a presentation.It is the worse feeling ever.I am now looking at substituting
my solid foods with healthy shakes,so that my body still gets the necessary
nutrients and supplements it requires to function on a daily basis.
Never in my wildest dream ever thought I would miss my
tears as I miss it today.
In the past whenever I you watched a sad movie or read a sad
book,I would cry my heart out.Sometimes when I felt emotional or depressed, I could just have
a cry and then I would feel better but now it is so difficult to deal with my
emotions as I literally can’t cry.I see tears as the only emotional form that
is real.Tears are the only thing that anyone can understand, see, or touch.But How do I express my joy,happiness,hurt,anger if I don’t have tears.
The one thought that is always crossing my mind is that what
if someone close to my die tomorrow, how I will be able to express my loss.What
if I get the honour to go perform Hadj or Umrah one day? People always talk about
how they cry the first time they see The Holy Kaabah and how they cry The day
of Arafat.Will I be able to experience all that emotions too?
Allah Swt knows best,May Allah Swt make it easy for all of us.Ameen In Shaa Allah.
